The Introductory Session
The initial meeting between you and your mediator is key. It is intended to help you decide whether you feel that mediation is the way forward for you. The mediator also needs to be able to assess whether mediation is suitable for you.
You can request that your first meeting be separate from your ex-partner. Most mediators would spend at least part of the meeting with you individually in any event, to assess whether there are personal safety issues. If you are applying for legal aid, this would also be dealt with individually.
When making your appointment, you will be sent a Referral Form. It is important that you complete this as fully as possible, as it contains basic initial information that the mediator requires.
If you mediator is going to assess your eligibility for legal aid, it is VITAL that you bring up-to-date proof of your income. Please see our leaflet/download Costs of mediation. If you do not bring the relevant paperwork, the session cannot proceed.
If you are not applying for public funding (or are not eligible) your mediator will discuss private costs with you.
Your mediator will explain to you how mediation works and the benefits of mediation compared to Court proceedings. You will be able to tell the mediator of any concerns you have, for example not being able to have your say or concealment of assets by your ex-partner.
Mediators are well trained to recognise and deal with what we call 'power imbalances' and will reassure you that the process will run fairly. Your view of what the issues for mediation are will also be considered. There will be an opportunity for you to ask the mediator about anything else about mediation.
If at the end of this initial discussion you feel that mediation is a way forward, your mediator will ask you both to sign an Agreement and mediation can begin.